What’s your excuse for not voting? Oh, wait. There isn’t one.

From the Guppie Life

I voted…

Tonight I went to college night at Apex in D.C., which means free cover with (expired) college ID. Plus cheap drinks.

Two anonymous boys came up to me and started dancing with me in a rather sexualized manner.

The first one shared the same first name as me, so obviously he was ruled out instantly. I’ve hooked up with other REAL FIRST NAME REDACTEDs before, and it’s just too awkward. Also, he was flirting with everyone in sight, which didn’t make me feel too special at all.

The second boy was dancing with his maybe-boyfriend, but he pulled me close and tried to hold my hand and whisper sweet-nothings in my ear. Then he tried to make out with me after about two minutes, so I might have oral herpes now. Unfortunate.

Luckily his boyfriend(?) got annoyed and they both went away.

The end.

p.s. Aren’t you totes impressed with my drunk typing skillz?

From the Guppie Life

Drunktober

First, Ian Ayres from Freakonomics compares marriage discrimination to racial segregation:

I view the legal exclusion of gay people from marriage as morally wrong; a form of invidious discrimination. Many people hold different substantive views about marriage equality.

But in this post, I want to focus on a different question: How should people respond to the legal option of taking a benefit that is invidiously denied others? It’s a question that transcends the specific issue of same-sex marriage. You can also ask, for example, whether it would ever have been appropriate for whites to drink from a “whites only” water fountain.

When I ask my students the water fountain question, very few whites say they would drink. But at the same time, heterosexual students who strongly oppose the marriage exclusion nonetheless, like me, choose to take the benefits of marriage that are, to our minds, denied others.

If I were straight and wanted to get married, I don’t think I’d hold out for marriage equality. But that’s just me. I’ve never been much of an activist.

Meanwhile, Clever Dude wonders if government should be involved in marriage at all:

Should the government provide ANY benefits to married couples, regardless of sexual orientation?

I’m questioning the whole foundation of government involvement in the institution of marriage. You see, since marriage just boils down to a contract, much like a business agreement, does government involvement in marriage go against our capitalistic foundation? In a capitalistic society, free enterprise and the market should determine the success or failure of ventures and contractual agreements. Marriages are certainly ventures between two parties, and marriages are contracts. Would you agree?

Personally, I’m fine with any sort of marriage, as long as it’s the same for everyone.

From the Guppie Life

Straight People Think About Gay Marriage, Too

Bloggers are supposed to write about the social issue du jour… and then… something happens? Sounds like an Internet feel-good circle jerk to me.

This year’s theme is poverty, so to celebrate I had some Ramen noodles for dinner.

Woohoo! I’m making a difference!

From the Guppie Life

It’s Blog Action Day! Wait, huh?

Too funny.

(Though I’d probably get addicted to just about anything if it meant getting a sing-along visit from Kristin Chenoweth.)

From the Guppie Life

Everything I Know About Crystal Meth I Learned from Kristin Chenoweth

Of course, so am I, and I do, too.

From the Guppie Life

Sarah Silverman is Offensive and Wants Your Grandparents to Vote for Obama

But I’ve been having a hard time staying motivated.

What’s wrong, you ask? I can’t really complain. I love my new car. I’ve been meeting boys. I’ve even made some meaningful contributions at work.

But Google hates me. More specifically, Google hates the Guppie Life. And I don’t know why.

Want to see for yourself?

See? All the results are talking ABOUT my blog. But Google doesn’t link to the blog itself. Back in the day it used to link to my blog and even my individual posts, but not for 6 months or so.

Sometimes people say Google does this as a punishment if a website owner has done something shady in an attempt to manipulate search rankings. But I haven’t, I swear! And of course, Google is a multi-billion dollar company. They aren’t going to take the time to explain to me why they’ve gone sour on me.

Why is this a big deal to me?

Well, search engine visitors are often the number one source of traffic to a blog. Many sites and blogs get up to as much as 90% of their traffic from search engines. Without appearing in the Google search results, many normal people (i.e. people who are not themselves also bloggers) will never find the Guppie Life. And without them I can’t become internet famous. (Joke.)

Fellow bloggers, I encourage you to read Can Google Be Trusted? from SEOBook.com. It could happen to you, too.

Anyway, I don’t think there’s much I can do about this. I just wanted to vent. Thanks for listening, friends.

From the Guppie Life

What Do You Do When Google Hates You?

I haven’t been blogging.

My gym caught fire.

I called in sick Friday. I felt horrid. The worst part about calling in sick on Friday is that no one believes you’re not just hung over. But I wasn’t.

I still haven’t taken the new (used) car to the shop. It has a few minor things left to be fixed that drive me mad, but it’s completely drivable, so I’ve been putting it off.

Boys are kind of predictable right now. In college, all I wanted was a boyfriend. In the real world, all I want is someone who can hold my interest.

My job is okay. My boss wants me to have input into the hiring process and the business strategy. It’s scary.

I’m the youngest employee. I have to manage work done by people much older than me, and sometimes I have to say things they don’t want to hear.

I try to compensate by keeping gum at my desk. There’s a Post-It that says, “Free Gum :).”

See the smiley face? I’m a friendly guy. Please don’t get mad at me.

This wasn’t a real blog entry.

From the Guppie Life

So I Suck, and Here are the Top Ten Reasons Why

Reward yourself with Uh Huh Her’s first music video, “Not a Love Song.” (Secretly I wish to befriend all of the lipstick lesbians in the world. Starting with Leisha Hailey.)

There’s a unicorn!

From the Guppie Life

Hump Day Pick Me Up

One of those smart people is Gary Gates, PhD. He thinks the suburbs are going to become very, very gay.

Suburbs, home ownership, and marriage — what’s left but the kids? In 1990, fewer than one in ten same-sex couples had children. Today, it’s more like one in five. In states like Mississippi, South Dakota, Alaska, South Carolina, and Louisiana, it’s one in three. The gay-by boom is alive and well in small town and suburban America. And these new parents are largely non-white. African-American and Latino/a lesbians and gay men are two to three times more likely than their white counterparts to be raising kids.

So back to the question at hand — my vision of suburbia circa 2050. Lesbian and gay families will be a much more visible community fixture. They’ll probably be married, own their homes, be raising a few kids, and will very likely not be white.

Cool.

From the Guppie Life

What’s the Future of Suburbia? Gay Families.